Friday, June 17, 2011

Mrs. Wishy-Washy

Despite being a fabulous children's book...this is also a description of me with most important decisions. I'm always worried that I've made the wrong choice...or that I've made one that will make others unhappy. Really--I need to just learn to have a spine. 

However, I do have a lot of opinions. So, it's not that I don't have a spine I's more that I worry too much about my decisions impacting others negatively or that I didn't think through all of the scenarios. 

This is an okay thing in many cases...but it seems to be a bad trait as a new mom. I'm always worrying that I'll make the wrong choice...create a bad habit or head down the wrong track from how we plan to "raise" LM. Will this cause us to go backwards in sleeping? Is it too early to try this? Should we wait longer to transition to this?  So many many ways to screw my kid up :-)

I know none of these are actually decisions that will probably cause any real long-term therapy consequences...I have no problem making the right decisions on safety/health issues.

It's almost like there are too many "right" ways out there.  Maybe I'm still searching for my mom style...maybe it would help if TH developed a style too...

I just wish I could commit to an idea/decision so that I could see the results---good or bad.  It's hard for me to do this---at the first sign of trouble, I second guess myself. Maybe I need to put parental controls on my internet searches :-)

I'm sure that as I journey through this, the decisions will become easier to make or at least easier to recognize as the ones I want to make.  I know we'll make mistakes...and they won't be as big of a deal as I imagine they will. I know LM will turn out all right in the long run...but man, it'll be a lot easier to make better choices with a second child!

1 comment:

  1. i think we raise them while we're trying to figure out how to do it, we're all pretty unsure of ourselves as first time parents and if someone says they're not they are only foolong themself. i'm sure you're doing a great job, and at this age they don't need much except love, bottles and diaper changes :)


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