Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Too many cooks...

Like I've mentioned in previous entries, I learn from a variety of "experts" in the form of other moms on the message boards I visit.  There's usually someone who has experienced what I'm curious about or is having the same issue.  It's also a forum for people to share the tips, techniques and theories they're subscribing to.

The most common topic that moms have a "theory" on is sleeping. From the Baby Whisperer, to Happiest Baby to Babywise--and everything in between--there is a sleep technique/theory book for everyone.  A lot of the time, what works is a combination of the techniques. MMBM (my message board moms) are quick to share what they're doing, what works...and what doesn't.  When I read about someone implementing something that is working great for them, it makes me want to try it right away. There are a lot of great solutions out there.

My problem is that I seem to make it worse when I try to make it better. We tend towards the E.A.S.Y method (eat, activity, sleep, your time) and a lot of the time it works for us. LO has gotten down the routine of staying awake after eating during the day and showing his sleepy cues to me as the evening wears on by wanting to snuggle after eating instead of "playing". We had been doing a last feeding around 9 or 930ish and letting him sleep on me until going to bed with us around 1000-1030. This was giving us a 3-5 hour stretch to start the night and then being up to eat around 3-4 usually and sleeping again until 5-6 when LH is getting around for work (ahh..gotta love maternity leave!). I even got those two elusive nights of 7-8 hours.

But then....then....I messed it up. I tried putting him down earlier, putting him down in his room...you name it...I effed it up.  I started reading too many techniques about how to increase sleep both in quantity and quality and what time everyone else's LO's are heading to bed (usually 7-8)...and it got me worrying that I was doing something wrong. So then I messed with it...and messed it up. And today I'm exhausted because he slept horrible last night and was even up wanting to snuggle for hours.

*sigh* I'm not sure what to do...whether I should just wing it and go with what is working or if I need to find a technique and stick with it until it works for us....anyone know what to do?


  1. JMO, but I'd go with whatever is working for you. For us, Cole falls asleep after every feed for several hours. He's slowly starting to sty awake a little while after and is content to chill in the playpen. When my husband gets home in the evening we do tummy time and baby yoga. Hang out on the couch and watch movies or play video games with Cole on our laps, feeding him. We get him ready for bed (changed and swaddled) because he'll crash during that feed. Let him sleep on the couch until we're ready for bed, then put him in the bassinet. He'll wake me around 4 to eat, then wakes the husband around 8. He eats about every 2 hours during the day, 4 at night. :) We do sometimes (rarely) get a full night's sleep, and I wish I knew what caused them so I could keep doing it!

    Everyone is going to have their own ideas about what works, but kids are so different from each other! It's good to read the techniques, but I'd take a little of column A, little of column B and make your own. Only you know what is going to work for your son, and don't let anyone tell you that you're doing it wrong. He's YOUR son!

  2. Thank you for your thoughts...I'm probably just overthinking it. I just need to get it through my head that we have plenty of time to establish a "bedtime" that seems "acceptable" by society...heck, maybe sleeping in his crib at night should be a better goal to tackle first! It's just hard to feel confident when I've got no idea what I'm doing and what the long-term ramifications are :-)


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