Let me preface this by saying that I really like our daycare lady. She is super sweet, is excited to see LM and he lights up when he sees her.
When we signed up with her last fall, she had two twin 3 year olds (the person who referred us). She told us that she could take up to 5 full time children. All was well and good.
Fast-forward to now---she's added two part time 10 month olds. They're there a few days a week, for part of the day. So it's the twins, LM and the 2 others. I've been feeling a little odd about it all. It seems like a LOT to me. I wouldn't be able to do that all day and I'm a teacher! It seems like LM is getting plenty of attention. But--really, there's no way to know. I know that there's no way to give all of them the amount of attention that I think I'd really want LM to have...but that's a relative thing because he's used to full time mommy and daddy attention (especially after the summer).
I'm trying to be tolerant of it all because it's all new. We just started Monday with him arriving at the normal time and I know that it takes awhile to establish a routine. Oh, and I'm the one bringing the baby who spits up everywhere (multiple outfit changes) and refuses to nap unless held for more than 20 minutes (for her, us, anyone...please be a phase, please be a phase).
But today when TH picked LM up, she told him about a 3 month old that will be starting in a few weeks--the fourth full time child. I already feel like she's overwhelmed and taking on a lot. Another little one...littler than my little one...it just seems like a lot.
We don't feel 100% comfortable with that many but not so much that we're ready to walk (it was really hard to find someone we liked!). I don't know how to express to her how we're feeling. I don't even know if it's my place. I tend to not make waves but maybe we should be.
I want what's best for LM...but I don't want to overreact (or under-react). I've not seen anything that makes me think he's not being taken care of properly. Do I wish she'd hold him more? Yes of course I do...but I'd hold him all day if I could! Do I think some of the spitting up issue could be helped if he sat on her lap instead of a bouncy chair or boppy after he's done eating? Probably. But I don't know what's reasonable.
I basically just need to know what you think about it all and what you'd do. I'm too tired to think deeply...please share your brains with me :-)
I sent a link to this post to a friend of mine who runs a daycare out of her home and has for many, many years. She has an 11-year-old daughter...and a 2-month-old daughter. If she doesn't comment herself, I'll let you know what she says! (I ask her LOTS of stuff 'cuz I have absolutely no idea what I am doing!)
ReplyDeleteMessage from aforementioned friend says:
ReplyDeleteTell her it is too much. I don't know about there, but we are only allowed 3 children at any time under 30 months. AND one of them has to be ambulatory, that means walking, and able to follow simple directions. While she was in compliance until adding the new child, she would be out of line up here with the new one. If I were her I would move her baby, and if it's a licensed facility find out the local laws, and report her if she isn't in compliance. (she won't get shut down, just a write up, and reminded in case she forgot the rules.)
Having 2 babies under a year, and one who is 2, and a four year old is a lot for me. I have days where I don't even get to sit down to eat, and I know there are days when the kids don't get their fair share of attention because one is sick, or one has more dirty diapers, or is hungrier. I do my best, but I'm only human. The provider in question is setting herself up for failure, and the kids up for some rough days.
:(
I wish her all the best.
it is so hard to know, most states have rules about how many kids/babies a daycare can have, yours sounds similar to mine in the amount of kids, of course, louise is a year and a half now, so it doesn't bother me as much as it might if she were your son's age. plus, the kids are all there at different times, sometimes she's got a full load and sometimes just a couple.
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