Where does it come from? This intense pressure that I feel for LM to do things and change. I'm not talking about things like crawling....for some reason, these kinds of milestones don't seem to upset me if he's behind. I trust that he'll get there--especially the gross motor ones since he's my chunky little monkey and it'll take more time.
there are these random things that I find myself feeling pressure about
things like sleep and food. The pedi mentioned that with the natural
transition to more food and less formula, he would naturally drop a
feeding. There was already one feeding that was feeling forced, so we
stopped that bottle and added some more food at dinner (the bottle was a
5pm one). It was working...but then he stopped sleeping well and I felt
so guilty about giving him that bottle again. I am because he's hungry
and wants it. And, with what I expect is an upcoming growth/milestone
spurt, I want him to have it. But--I feel like he's going backwards. I
know he's not. Rationally, I get this. But--I worry that I'm holding him
back somehow...that he's drinking too much and not eating enough. I
read about babies his age in my mom group that are eating multiple jars
of baby food, plus table food in a day...and sometimes he just doesn't
want to eat that much. I don't want to hold him back....and I'm sure
But--I worry that I'm babying him. Ironic--I
know. I worry that he can handle eating more--especially table foods.
That he wants more types of foods, bigger pieces, bigger quantities
etc...and I'm holding him back, so he gets bored and wants nothing to do
with it. There's no guide to this whole motherhood thing...I get that.
But--i am SO SICK of hearing that I should just do what is best for my
baby. How I am supposed to know this?????? I need to hear more specific
plans/experiences that people have used to transition. I'm tired of just
guessing (and by guessing, I mean reading a ton of things and make a
semi-informed decision). I'm tired of TH relying on me to figure it out.
I'm tired of him assuming that I know what I'm doing when it comes to
I'm just tired of it. Speaking of
tired...sleep is the other area. If one more person asks me whether he's
STTN...and then gives me a "look"...I will punch them. Guarantee it. I
know sleep goes in cycles and that with new things/spurts/life, sleep
changes. You ladies have been more than helpful in this area. But--I
still feel so frustrated. TH thinks that I'm causing some of his bad
sleep habits. And--it's possible. He likes to hold my hand through the
crib slats as he falls asleep, rubbing on my fingers. He doesn't NEED
to...and sometimes, like tonight, he falls asleep on his own anyway. I
also can't handle him crying and tend to go to him quickly to give him
his paci or, if he's really upset, to pick him up and rock him. I know
know know that he is capable of self-soothing and that it is
counter-intuitive to pick him up. I can't handle CIO...and I've yet to
figure out what "method" I want to use. I just need something....ugh.
(to those of you still reading), what I need is to back the F off
myself. I'm creating the pressure. No one else (except TH, who really
only argues but has no follow thru to help fix it and really doesn't
know what to do either so I don't have to do what he thinks!) is
pressuring me to make him eat or sleep more "normally". It's all about
some arbitrary goal I set for myself....and for him....and it needs to
stop. He won't drink bottles forever and I don't see a ton of kids
waking up all night....so I know in time it all passes. I just need to
give myself a break.
Thanks for listening.