Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Happy 4th!

To celebrate this year, we're headed to the IL's (2 hours away) so LM can watch the kick-butt parade their town has. I can only hope he'll love the 50+ fire/police/rescue vehicles that start off the parade. I know he'll love the elephants and motorcycles (not together of course!). I'm sure he'll enjoy dancing to the music of the floats. What I'm not sure about though, is whether he'll survive the whole two hours in the heat....because we're trapped there. Once the street is closed down, we're stuck where we're at and frankly, I can't handle the smell of the house we'll be outside it is!

Last year, I made a long introspective post about the freedoms that we women have gained over the years in the baby-making (natural, assisted, social or not at all) choices. I wish I was feeling that deep again this year. But, alas, I'm not.

If anything, I feel less independent this year. Knowing that soon we'll have two children and finances will be tight, I realize that life is about to change. There will be more restrictions on us and what we are free to do. I know that we still have these choices...that independence wasn't taken away....and that we chose to have another child (well, we chose to not prevent having one I guess). However, I feel a shift in our life from carefree to more "traditional". We'll be even more homebodies than we were this last year. We'll worry about money and the future more. We'll face new (to us) obstacles. We're entering a time in our lives where it truly will not be about us...that time will have to wait. The phrase "when the kids are older" has been popping up more in reference to when we'll do things or how to do things. This unknown territory is scary.

However, my goal this fourth of July is to again focus on bravery (as in "home of the brave") and less on the independence part of it all. I'll have to be brave(r) now...make scary choices, make sacrifices, be more trusting of myself, my children and those around me who want to "help". We'll see how it with any new frontier they'll be obstacles. And if my love of the game Oregon Trail has taught me, possibly snakebites, malaria and broken wagon wheels :-)

Happy Fourth!


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