While I spend a long time finding time to compose the last post (and actually publishing), positive things have been going on around here!
Saturday, PS rolled over belly to back!!!! She adores being on her side--often using her legs to squish herself up into a fetal position from her back while sleeping--so I have been trying to get her as much tummy time as possible because I want her to have strong (un-crooked!) neck muscles in case she gets over onto her stomach before she really can control it and end up on her face. And--using her awesome head control to lean herself over, she rolled right over onto her back!! I, of course, flipped her back after celebrating and had her do it again :-)
I immediately wanted to find out when LM did it--so I went to check his baby book. Turns out, that while I have lots of other things in there....this is where I eventually found the answer--in his virtual baby book of sorts! He rolled belly to back at 14weeks and she did it at 11 weeks.
So--PS is ahead of the curve in the gross motor department...at least in our household :-)
Monday, December 31, 2012
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Truly the second child...
PS is truly the second child...because if she weren't..she'd probably be our only.
She has reflux--and even medicated twice a day--it still bothers her. Her fussiness is better--she smiles and coos (at us sometimes, at her flower decals above her changing table...always!). She still is hard to console in the evening...she still has some witching hour tendencies. This usually indicates to me that she is ready for her evening dose but even so, she's happiest when being held by mama. TH is great with her and helps out a ton with LM...but most times, she just won't calm down for anyone but me...me rocking/swaying/bouncing etc. It's hard--sometimes I just want to put her down or for her to just STOP. But, I know that she'll calm soon, so we power through. I'm going to have killer back/ab muscles soon!
This last week, after giving her the first bottle of formula in preparation for the return to work (as you might remember from LM, pumping at work is a stressful, not productive endeavor for me so we're sticking with formula during the day and hopefully bf'ing at night/breakfast), PS was a bit fussier than normal until about 5 hours post bottle (3oz) when she became covered in hives! Cue major freak-out on my part---all topped off with a heaping helping of guilt. Later that night, she had two poopy diapers with some blood in them, as well as an increased mucous amount (lately, post starting Zantac her diapers have become more green/mucousy). Again---Fah-reak out! I researched, consulted the mamas in LM's FB group who are experts in allergies etc and pretty discovered that we were most likely dealing with a milk protein/soy intolerance. I've been reducing my dairy intake over the last month or so to see if it would help. Luckily, the next day we had her 2month well-baby check up anyway so we were able to get into talk with the pedi about it. Nonetheless, I spent all of the night worried and listening to her breathe.
Her pedi took a look at the pictures of her hives (gone by this point), looked at the diapers and talked with us about my diet, the formula etc. She immediately suggested MPSI as a strong possibility and got a referral to a pediatric allergist going. She told me to cut out all dairy until we talked with the allergist and he gave his rec's. She gave us a sample of some hypoallergenic formula--no milk protein, soy etc. We tried a bottle of it with her the next day--she HATED the taste, which I heard was to be expected but she took a couple of ounces so we figured we would keep trying (I'm only replacing 1-2 feeds a day until next week). We were able to get an appointment (at the crack of dawn) with the allergist the next day (48 hours after this all started). He listened to what happened and said that he wanted to do the skin prick test for a milk allergy. However, he explained that the blood in her diaper tells him that her body can't handle milk so even if she tests negative for the milk allergy, she still has an intolerance and shouldn't have any milk until close to 12months. So, we did the test and she did not test + for a milk allergy. So, we're dealing with a milk protein intolerance.
This is a great link that explains the difference between an allergy/intolerance etc---it helped me figure out how to explain it all to TH and family.
Anyway--we kept trying the hypoallergenic formula....and she kept hating it worse and worse. It got to the point where she wouldn't even drink pumped breast milk from a bottle because she was associating it. TH and I talked and decided that we needed to try a soy formula. Why? 1) She wasn't tested for a soy allergy so we weren't sure if she actually had that 2) If she would drink it and thrive on it, it's not $30 a canister (retail) like the hypoallergenic ones. We tried it and she's had several days of 2 bottles a day with no hives. She still has some eczema patches (but had them before) and some days I still feel like she's having tummy troubles. But, soy can add to constipation so it's possible that she's just having some gas issues. I've been giving her gas drops with each bottle. She still is having some mucousy poops but she's still getting about 1/2 her feeds from me and I haven't been dairy free yet for 2 weeks (and may have had a few tiny cheats with some holiday goodies) so it's possible that is from me.
My issue at the moment is that I don't know anything for sure---not even that she doesn't have a milk protein allergy as the allergist explained that it often won't show up on a test until after repeated exposures (which I'm not planning on doing). It's not often that he sees children with such controlled circumstances (only breastfeeding except for the one bottle) when they have a reaction...and after only one instance. I also don't know that she doesn't have a soy intolerance...if I could go back, I'd have him at least test for that too on the allergy test. But--I don't. So, until she's 100% on the formula, I won't know if it's the dairy in me or a soy intolerance. And, if it is a soy intolerance, than our only option at that point is the hypo formula she hates (because by then, my supply won't be salvageable.). I'm planning on upping the number of bottles she has this week to 3-4 (depending on when she gets up) to mimic a day at daycare so that may shed some light too. I may also put a call into her pedi this week to discuss her thoughts on soy and maybe about getting a sample of the other hypo formula---I can't stomach spending $30 dollars on something she may not touch. If we end up with a total MPSI (milk protein soy intolerance) than it is what it is...and we'll chance our lifestyle to accommodate the additional cost.
I'm having a LOT of guilt about leaving her soon, not being strong enough to go 100% dairy free for her and a whole host of other issues (Did I eat/drink/do something while pregnant to cause this etc? Yes, I know I didn't. But still, it's in my head). I'm going to try to do better and post more in the next week....because I realize how crazy it will be when I get back to work. I thought for sure that I'd be able to post more frequently while home on leave with her (like I did with LM) but she is truly a different child than him and has required much more of me.
Thanks for reading this...it helps to even type it out.
She has reflux--and even medicated twice a day--it still bothers her. Her fussiness is better--she smiles and coos (at us sometimes, at her flower decals above her changing table...always!). She still is hard to console in the evening...she still has some witching hour tendencies. This usually indicates to me that she is ready for her evening dose but even so, she's happiest when being held by mama. TH is great with her and helps out a ton with LM...but most times, she just won't calm down for anyone but me...me rocking/swaying/bouncing etc. It's hard--sometimes I just want to put her down or for her to just STOP. But, I know that she'll calm soon, so we power through. I'm going to have killer back/ab muscles soon!
This last week, after giving her the first bottle of formula in preparation for the return to work (as you might remember from LM, pumping at work is a stressful, not productive endeavor for me so we're sticking with formula during the day and hopefully bf'ing at night/breakfast), PS was a bit fussier than normal until about 5 hours post bottle (3oz) when she became covered in hives! Cue major freak-out on my part---all topped off with a heaping helping of guilt. Later that night, she had two poopy diapers with some blood in them, as well as an increased mucous amount (lately, post starting Zantac her diapers have become more green/mucousy). Again---Fah-reak out! I researched, consulted the mamas in LM's FB group who are experts in allergies etc and pretty discovered that we were most likely dealing with a milk protein/soy intolerance. I've been reducing my dairy intake over the last month or so to see if it would help. Luckily, the next day we had her 2month well-baby check up anyway so we were able to get into talk with the pedi about it. Nonetheless, I spent all of the night worried and listening to her breathe.
Her pedi took a look at the pictures of her hives (gone by this point), looked at the diapers and talked with us about my diet, the formula etc. She immediately suggested MPSI as a strong possibility and got a referral to a pediatric allergist going. She told me to cut out all dairy until we talked with the allergist and he gave his rec's. She gave us a sample of some hypoallergenic formula--no milk protein, soy etc. We tried a bottle of it with her the next day--she HATED the taste, which I heard was to be expected but she took a couple of ounces so we figured we would keep trying (I'm only replacing 1-2 feeds a day until next week). We were able to get an appointment (at the crack of dawn) with the allergist the next day (48 hours after this all started). He listened to what happened and said that he wanted to do the skin prick test for a milk allergy. However, he explained that the blood in her diaper tells him that her body can't handle milk so even if she tests negative for the milk allergy, she still has an intolerance and shouldn't have any milk until close to 12months. So, we did the test and she did not test + for a milk allergy. So, we're dealing with a milk protein intolerance.
This is a great link that explains the difference between an allergy/intolerance etc---it helped me figure out how to explain it all to TH and family.
Anyway--we kept trying the hypoallergenic formula....and she kept hating it worse and worse. It got to the point where she wouldn't even drink pumped breast milk from a bottle because she was associating it. TH and I talked and decided that we needed to try a soy formula. Why? 1) She wasn't tested for a soy allergy so we weren't sure if she actually had that 2) If she would drink it and thrive on it, it's not $30 a canister (retail) like the hypoallergenic ones. We tried it and she's had several days of 2 bottles a day with no hives. She still has some eczema patches (but had them before) and some days I still feel like she's having tummy troubles. But, soy can add to constipation so it's possible that she's just having some gas issues. I've been giving her gas drops with each bottle. She still is having some mucousy poops but she's still getting about 1/2 her feeds from me and I haven't been dairy free yet for 2 weeks (and may have had a few tiny cheats with some holiday goodies) so it's possible that is from me.
My issue at the moment is that I don't know anything for sure---not even that she doesn't have a milk protein allergy as the allergist explained that it often won't show up on a test until after repeated exposures (which I'm not planning on doing). It's not often that he sees children with such controlled circumstances (only breastfeeding except for the one bottle) when they have a reaction...and after only one instance. I also don't know that she doesn't have a soy intolerance...if I could go back, I'd have him at least test for that too on the allergy test. But--I don't. So, until she's 100% on the formula, I won't know if it's the dairy in me or a soy intolerance. And, if it is a soy intolerance, than our only option at that point is the hypo formula she hates (because by then, my supply won't be salvageable.). I'm planning on upping the number of bottles she has this week to 3-4 (depending on when she gets up) to mimic a day at daycare so that may shed some light too. I may also put a call into her pedi this week to discuss her thoughts on soy and maybe about getting a sample of the other hypo formula---I can't stomach spending $30 dollars on something she may not touch. If we end up with a total MPSI (milk protein soy intolerance) than it is what it is...and we'll chance our lifestyle to accommodate the additional cost.
I'm having a LOT of guilt about leaving her soon, not being strong enough to go 100% dairy free for her and a whole host of other issues (Did I eat/drink/do something while pregnant to cause this etc? Yes, I know I didn't. But still, it's in my head). I'm going to try to do better and post more in the next week....because I realize how crazy it will be when I get back to work. I thought for sure that I'd be able to post more frequently while home on leave with her (like I did with LM) but she is truly a different child than him and has required much more of me.
Thanks for reading this...it helps to even type it out.
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
First Christmas
Today is Ps's first Christmas and the first that LM will remember. It's been a blast so far watching him open his and his sister's presents (little miss decided to sleep in!). It's such a special time through little eyes.
Soon the house will be full of family all ready to celebrate...cue dissipation of special and onslaught of stress :-)
Happy Holidays!
Soon the house will be full of family all ready to celebrate...cue dissipation of special and onslaught of stress :-)
Happy Holidays!
Friday, December 14, 2012
Just babies
I teach kindergarten. Don't know if I ever mentioned that.
Parents bring me their babies every August--many their first in school. They trust me to educate them. They worry about school supplies and them riding the bus with the big kids. They do not worry about me keeping them safe.
They're just babies. Why would they worry about that?
I used to tell parents anyway that anyone wanting to hurt or take their child would have to come through me. And meant it. But now that I have my babies, I don't know that I could say it anymore. That I could leave my babies like that. However, each student in my classroom is someone's baby. Could I let them die because of some deranged person?
No. I don't think so. They aren't big enough to defend me or fight someone off. I am their protector. I would expect others to do it for my babies.
To take a child's life because of a dispute you have with an adult is unacceptable. Any child. No matter your beef.
They were just babies.
Parents bring me their babies every August--many their first in school. They trust me to educate them. They worry about school supplies and them riding the bus with the big kids. They do not worry about me keeping them safe.
They're just babies. Why would they worry about that?
I used to tell parents anyway that anyone wanting to hurt or take their child would have to come through me. And meant it. But now that I have my babies, I don't know that I could say it anymore. That I could leave my babies like that. However, each student in my classroom is someone's baby. Could I let them die because of some deranged person?
No. I don't think so. They aren't big enough to defend me or fight someone off. I am their protector. I would expect others to do it for my babies.
To take a child's life because of a dispute you have with an adult is unacceptable. Any child. No matter your beef.
They were just babies.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
That scary moment when...
Your child got up early, didn't nap so he went to bed hardcore at 630pm....only to wake up at 1000...and you realize that he may have just taken a nap!
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Knock on Wood
Th jinxed us. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday PS slept from around 9-10pm to around 6-7am! It was crazy refreshing...except for the engorgement.
Then last night, Th went and opened his yap about how she sleeps through the night now. No!!!! Why would he say something like that? Surely he knows better!? He didn't even knock on wood.
And of course, she woke up at 4am. We're still better off than with LM but man, who knows how long our streak could've been? Silly men.
Then last night, Th went and opened his yap about how she sleeps through the night now. No!!!! Why would he say something like that? Surely he knows better!? He didn't even knock on wood.
And of course, she woke up at 4am. We're still better off than with LM but man, who knows how long our streak could've been? Silly men.
Friday, November 30, 2012
War
Is it bad that I don't think I'm going to bother whether I'm building bad habits (with both kiddos really)?
I have just over a month before I go back to work. And frankly, I just want to soak up the newborn time so much that it doesn't seem important if I'm holding her for a lot of naps. Soon, someone else will spend all day with her and I'll be awarded just a few short hours every night to be with her/them. I know good sleep habits are important but come on...surely not that bad right?
I'm just feeling low today about it being our last (and yes, it def is). I'm so torn between trying to what's "right" for development etc and what feels good to me. I want to do better this time around. I know the mistakes we made last time. And I should be trying to not repeat them...but I also don't want to miss anything. Spending lots of time with a newborn and LM has made me see just what I'm missing and what I have missed by being at work (and no that can't change either). It's heartbreaking and wonderful at the same time (you know, because I haven't totally screwed up my kid).
It's so hard to know what to do.
I have just over a month before I go back to work. And frankly, I just want to soak up the newborn time so much that it doesn't seem important if I'm holding her for a lot of naps. Soon, someone else will spend all day with her and I'll be awarded just a few short hours every night to be with her/them. I know good sleep habits are important but come on...surely not that bad right?
I'm just feeling low today about it being our last (and yes, it def is). I'm so torn between trying to what's "right" for development etc and what feels good to me. I want to do better this time around. I know the mistakes we made last time. And I should be trying to not repeat them...but I also don't want to miss anything. Spending lots of time with a newborn and LM has made me see just what I'm missing and what I have missed by being at work (and no that can't change either). It's heartbreaking and wonderful at the same time (you know, because I haven't totally screwed up my kid).
It's so hard to know what to do.
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Burping=my life
If I thought LM was hard to burp, man PS takes it to a whole new level. She's like the Ft. Knox of burps. I get a good burp maybe one out of every three times we burp her...which is super good for her spitting up. Did I tell you she's on reflux meds now? I'll get into it more another time.
The difficulty to do something as simple as burping a baby seems to be a projection of my life right now. It seems so much harder this time around. Being a mom is supposed to be harder when you're clueless and fumbly.
But this time, everything is harder--spitting up, breastfeeding, keeping diapers from blowing out, managing being a wife, hygiene in general etc. I trying to manage my goody two shoes side--the one that is used to tasks and skills coming easily and the same one that gets crazy insecure when something is hard. I know being a mom isn't supposed to be easy and it's supposed to challenge you. But, when the simple things elude you, it makes you question whether you were cut out for it all.
I'm sure these feelings pass. I'm sure that with LM it was all still such a blur right now that it never would've occurred to me to focus on what was hard...because its all hard. It's just one of those things I guess.
The difficulty to do something as simple as burping a baby seems to be a projection of my life right now. It seems so much harder this time around. Being a mom is supposed to be harder when you're clueless and fumbly.
But this time, everything is harder--spitting up, breastfeeding, keeping diapers from blowing out, managing being a wife, hygiene in general etc. I trying to manage my goody two shoes side--the one that is used to tasks and skills coming easily and the same one that gets crazy insecure when something is hard. I know being a mom isn't supposed to be easy and it's supposed to challenge you. But, when the simple things elude you, it makes you question whether you were cut out for it all.
I'm sure these feelings pass. I'm sure that with LM it was all still such a blur right now that it never would've occurred to me to focus on what was hard...because its all hard. It's just one of those things I guess.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
In the Napping House...
where everyone is sleeping. Except me---I'm like the flea :-)
TH went back to work yesterday. I'm beyond lucky that he's been able to take a full six weeks off with both babies. It's made survival possible. It's also helped us bond as a family....that and been a pair of hands to grab Little Monkey before he tries to clobber PS. He told me the other day that he'd been talking to a co-worker at a party who was about to have a baby. Her husband didn't want to "miss much work" so he was only taking off a week (though he works where we do and could do six weeks if he wanted). TH told her that he'd never make a different choice because they grow so quickly and you don't get this time back......melt.
However, now we're back to a bit of reality. It's hard with the two of them on my own. I'm having to do things to keep LM busy while I'm feeding her that I didn't "want" to do---tv shows, YouTube etc. Granted, we're keeping it low key...Elmo and Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood (love the nostalgia factor) but still, it's not what I wanted to do. Up until now, we've been books and playing together. I think that a lot of his imagination and vast (if I say so myself) vocabulary come from this. But--I suppose that's what parenting is...doing all the things you said you wouldn't in order to survive.
Today went well but it's exhausting to be "on it" all the time. When I was home with LM at this age, we'd lounge around on the playmat--exploring and talking--while I jumped up for coffee etc when I needed to. I can't put PS down where LM can reach her for fear he'll be loving/hugging/kissing on her and then go all smacky/grabby to her face (nobody wants the baby who looks like a UFC fighter). LM and I had all sorts of fun adult tv on in the background while we snuggled and sang....and now, I keep it off or LM starts asking for "Grandma Tiger" (Daniel Tiger)....can you tell he loves it? :-) And his one episode a day goes by quickly!
I'm enjoying the peace and quiet of right now....somehow they managed to end up sleeping at the same time. And I got a chance to finish the coffee I started at 9am and go to the restroom. But, soon one or the other (or both) will be up and we'll be off again at full speed. I miss TH...for his corralling skills but also because I know he's missing out. PS is starting to smile (granted not at me or anyone who cares for her basic needs...but the floor decals on the wall above her changing table) and LM can sing the ABC song....they're growing so fast. My time with them will be over soon and I'll be the one back to work...missing it all. So I'll try to remind myself to be happy about the awake moments we have together.
But for now....I'll cherish the peace and quiet :-)
TH went back to work yesterday. I'm beyond lucky that he's been able to take a full six weeks off with both babies. It's made survival possible. It's also helped us bond as a family....that and been a pair of hands to grab Little Monkey before he tries to clobber PS. He told me the other day that he'd been talking to a co-worker at a party who was about to have a baby. Her husband didn't want to "miss much work" so he was only taking off a week (though he works where we do and could do six weeks if he wanted). TH told her that he'd never make a different choice because they grow so quickly and you don't get this time back......melt.
However, now we're back to a bit of reality. It's hard with the two of them on my own. I'm having to do things to keep LM busy while I'm feeding her that I didn't "want" to do---tv shows, YouTube etc. Granted, we're keeping it low key...Elmo and Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood (love the nostalgia factor) but still, it's not what I wanted to do. Up until now, we've been books and playing together. I think that a lot of his imagination and vast (if I say so myself) vocabulary come from this. But--I suppose that's what parenting is...doing all the things you said you wouldn't in order to survive.
Today went well but it's exhausting to be "on it" all the time. When I was home with LM at this age, we'd lounge around on the playmat--exploring and talking--while I jumped up for coffee etc when I needed to. I can't put PS down where LM can reach her for fear he'll be loving/hugging/kissing on her and then go all smacky/grabby to her face (nobody wants the baby who looks like a UFC fighter). LM and I had all sorts of fun adult tv on in the background while we snuggled and sang....and now, I keep it off or LM starts asking for "Grandma Tiger" (Daniel Tiger)....can you tell he loves it? :-) And his one episode a day goes by quickly!
I'm enjoying the peace and quiet of right now....somehow they managed to end up sleeping at the same time. And I got a chance to finish the coffee I started at 9am and go to the restroom. But, soon one or the other (or both) will be up and we'll be off again at full speed. I miss TH...for his corralling skills but also because I know he's missing out. PS is starting to smile (granted not at me or anyone who cares for her basic needs...but the floor decals on the wall above her changing table) and LM can sing the ABC song....they're growing so fast. My time with them will be over soon and I'll be the one back to work...missing it all. So I'll try to remind myself to be happy about the awake moments we have together.
But for now....I'll cherish the peace and quiet :-)
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